This post contains scenes that may disturb some viewers.

[active_apathy]

"You've hidden me several times now. Would you like to turn me off?"

Yes. Yes, yes! Oh god, yes. Yes, I would. Now, I'm not saying it won't be hard; rather, it'll be incredibly easy. Incredibly, incredibly easy.

I am, of course, talking for the moment about the hideously annoying paperclip found in MS Office. For many, many months now, I haven't had to even touch that particular assortment of poorly-written features and soul-devouring bugs, so it's been a special experience to have to start submitting essays and reports electronically as MS Word files.

I just thought it was worth mentioning that, just once, the paperclip offered to do something useful.

From there, we move on to the spectacularly brilliant ratings advice for the Ice Age sequel. What ratings advice? The advice that parental guidance is recommended on account of a mild sense of menace.

Now, I could write something mildly menacing, or I could rant endlessly about there even being a tickybox on their classification forms for mild senses of menace, but that's not where my mind wants to take this one.

Oh, no. Not at all. It makes me want to find out what exactly appears on the Office of Film and Literature Classification Menace Scorecard. Are there set criteria for mild menace? Is there medium menace? Hot and spicy menace? Original recipe menace (which involves unusual colours and varying levels of stellar rightness)? If you're accompanied by a puppy, does that help offset the level of menace?

And could I get these answers, and more, by mildly menacing those in the know?

Possibly even by use of murderous stick figures:



Alas, their menace is dangerously easy to undermine with Photoshop.



And that's about it for this post. Remember, you can still go and add questions.

Comments

[shaysdays.livejournal.com]

Are there set criteria for mild menace?

Generally if the menace is to children, it's worth mentioning.

And we all know the puppy never dies- it would break the law of moviedom. Remember Independence Day? Thousands of people being vaporized, drowned, or just plain ol' blown up, and everyone in the theatre cheers when the dog makes it to a hiding place. Presumably we were also happy Vivica A Fox was safe, too, but really she was just there to show the puppy The Way.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Children need a little bit of menace. Why, back in my day there were forest fires and wolves that eat characters, and we liked it.

And it's good that the puppy never dies (except where the filmmaker is evil and doesn't like puppies, and there will be much stabbity death for them). The Survival Of The Puppy is one of the very few things I liked about Independence Day.

[shaysdays.livejournal.com]

I agree- which is why anything by Tim Burton gets automatic tickets at our house- Neener loves scary stuff.

Which reminds me, I have to rent Labyrinth for her. (And possibly the Fifth Element, she likes movies about kick-ass girls. Hurrah! Two more to add to the list.)

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Yay for the automatic Leeloo Dallas Multipasses. :)