For the Benefit of HP Fanentities:

[active_apathy]

I'll add as a disclaimer that I haven't read a scrap of HP. This may be surprising to many of you, but it's entirely true. Still, in the interests of the HP fanentities on my Flist, we have this entry.

We all know that the sixteenth is the release date for a certain novel. This might be because the HP fandom likes to keep reminging us, but that's neither here nor there. The real point is that, where there is Art, there are spoilers. I'm certain that this isn't a new trend - Picasso may have chased after people whispering "she's weeping", Leonardo may have been distressed at people telling everyone what happened at the end of the Sforza Horse*, and Tacitus probably wanted to slap someone for wandering into the Forum and shouting about what happens to Caligula.

No, it isn't a new phenomenon at all - but I think there is a solution. A simple, elegant solution that'll see all spoilers forever consigned to... um... somewhere else. Here, we have a post where you can write spoiler-spoilers. Tell us how the novel's about to be spoiled. Ruin the suspense of tiptoeing around spoilercuts. Be funny, for I suspect everyone can do with a laugh. Spoil spoilers for any fandom at all, because I'm feeling nice.

Go! Comment! Spoil the Spoilers! Ruin the Ruination! Topple the Threads! Demystify the Denouements! Herald the Heresies! Announce the... bah, you get it.

MAKE SPOILAGE HISTORY

*Not what you'd think. The brass was used to forge cannon.

Comments

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

I don't consider anything a spoiler until 24 hours after the book's been published - after that, it's either a spoiler or lie; before that, it's just rumour.

So I've been hearing a rumour going round that Remus and Tonks get together.

And this has me slightly distraught. As you probably know, I'm a huge Sirius/Remus fangirl.

This is an extremely odd thing. I never used to care this much. I laughed at rabid shippers! And now I am one!

This is the stupidest thing ever! They're just peripheral characters in an engrossing, but admittedly not the best written, series!

Augh. I am so ashamed of myself. I don't know what I'm going to do if it turns out to be true. I don't want to know - I think I may hate myself.

[djcati.livejournal.com]

psst -- Sirius is dead.

:D

I figure that's just a rumour too (the uh, Remus/Tonks... not the Sirius is dead... uh yeah), but y'know, you gonna make the poor guy lie around depressed the whole time? Tonks is pretty cool..

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

Tonks is pretty cool, and yeah, Sirius is dead. But I want Remus to be single by the end of the series so that we can all write slashy slashy Bring Back Black fics.

I know, my reaction to this: totally ridiculous. I just . . . Remus belongs with Sirius goddammit!

Argh! I am so ashamed.

[djcati.livejournal.com]

I suppose that's understandable. They are so wonderfully OTP after all. <3

(Also, your name, in my inbox, it kills me. Hee.)

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

They are! So OTP!

If JKR sinks this ship I will cry for days and days and days (and then write slashy fics where Tonks gives up her life to bring Sirius back because she knows she'll never make Remus truly happy - with my own tears as ink!)

sosososo ashamed

[djcati.livejournal.com]

But what if she includes lots of Remus-angsting-about-Sirius, like, "omg Tonks I can't my love is dead butbutbut I can" ... but not badfic-style.

Y'know. Like. Just confirming what we already know, that Remus/Sirius was totally canon.

... but, y'know, Tonks can't go with Remus anyway. Cause she's totally with Bernard. (What do you mean, milliways_bar isn't canon?!)

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

If she does that I will love her for EVAR.

Honestly, I don't care what she does so long as that ship continues to sail.

Bernard? As in Black Books Bernard? Or some other Bernard? I confess I don't follow milliways_bar.

Tonks is too young for Remus, anyway. I always picked her as being about 23 or so. She ought to get with Bill.

[djcati.livejournal.com]

She needs to... ahhh, we'll find out in three and a half days. :O

No.. actually, I have no idea. I just know Bernard/Tonks is totally one of my crack!OTPs. Gotta love Milliways.

Yeah, she does seem sorta young for him. o_O As for Bill, though, I keep getting confused because fandom keeps making me think that Bill/Fleur is canon. WTF.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Is it a narky Bernard who's sarcastic as they come, owns a bookshop and lives on wine and cigarettes?

[djcati.livejournal.com]

Nope... I know his last name's Wrangle, and he likes bombs.

He is snarky, though.

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

Well, they did have "English" lessons, you know. Maybe she taught him some French . . . kissing.

Eww. Lamest joke EVAR.

[djcati.livejournal.com]

You mean Freedom kissing, of course.

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

Hahahaha.

Totally : ) Free that tongue, baby!

[secondsilk.livejournal.com]

I haven't followed Milliways (But I would love to). I read the Jive article, though. Your comment made me laugh quite embarassingly.

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

PS I assume you mean the "Someone has it in for Monopoly" name? Hee! Thanks! You're the first person to comment on it, and I'm so glad it was a nice comment. After the shit that went down in metaquotes, I was a little nervous.

Yours is pretty dang funky too!

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Oh, come on. My unstoppable imagination was thinking much worse. They just needed one more street before they could start bombing houses and hotels on them.

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

They could have blown up a giant silver top-hat!

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

And a silver wheelbarrow!

I hope the big, silver dog is still safe.

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

I believe he's pissing on Big Ben as we speak.

[djcati.livejournal.com]

Yes indeed. I was the one who meta'd it, after all. XD It still cracks me up liekwhoa. (Though I'm annoyed at myself for not metaquoting the "Looks like Harry won't be getting to Hogwarts this year" one. Dude, I could've been f_w'd. Again, I mean.)

Hee. Mine is wild_n_kayzie's fault.

[liadlaith.livejournal.com]

That wank was so engrossing. I read it all when it was only at 300-odd comments, but then she started deleting all her comments and I got bored.