Memesies

[active_apathy]

...which looks like an astonishingly bad spelling of mimesis, only it's not.



lonecow posted a post in which there was a list listing skills she skilfully has that may usefully be of use if ever the zombies gather for a Zombie Apocalypse¹.

So! Meme.

1. Make a list of skills you have for surviving a zombie apocalypse.
2. Post your list.
   

And now, the list!

• Basic skills at stabbityness!
• May need to be reworked as hackityslashiness, because nothing says "NO! No brains for you!" quite like decapitation.
• Ever-so-slightly-less-basic skills at shooting stuff with bows!
• Thwip!
• ...
  
• Thwack!
• Morale!
• At the very least, it seems to work well enough here.
• It may also see me shot/thrown out of the shelter/elected president of the survivors for (carefully) teaching the zombies (from a safe distance) to say "Needs moar brainz. We can has brains? Pls to be brains timez nao."
• Apocalyptic tactics!
  
• Once elected president of the survivors, official edicts would be passed against stupid acts such as:
• Splitting Up (12483-D)
• Not Looking Up (48624-F)
• Pressing Play on Tape Recordings of the Necronomicon (13854-P)
  
• Saying "It Could Be Worse" (35497-S), or
• Teaching Zombies to Speak Lolcat (46578-E)
• Not-Quite-MacGyverish Resourcefulness!
• Perfect for that last-resort defense of the apocalyptic acquisitions² team.
• Cataloguing of Remaining Human Knowledge!
• Because, really, there's nothing worse than knowing you've got the perfect book on how to most efficiently turn zombies into scatterings of body parts, only to not know where it is.
• Booze Manufacturing!
• Not entirely tested, but still: Distilling! Brewing!
• Some Sewing!
• Accidentally stabbing myself with a needle and blessing your garment with blood is just one service I provide.
  
• Quick Learning!
• In a zombie apocalypse, attrition is inevitable. It's best to plan for those with essential skills - explosives manufacture, armouring, weaponsmithing, apocalyptic acquisitions² and other such life-critical talents to die, often horribly, and become zombies themselves.
• The ability to quickly gain new skills from others with specialist knowledge is therefore essential for long-term survival.
  
• Group Training!
• What's the point of learning others' skills if you don't then do your level best to stamp them into the brains of new survivors, brains that will hopefully do their level best to not be eaten.
• Because having your brain eaten by zombies is kind of a silly plan, really.
• Also, because those classes were compulsory, and I'd like to get some use out of them.
  

And I think that's it, unless you want silly ideas, like making big glass cylinders, closed at one end, which can be put over a zombie until someone comes along to put them back outside.



Also, yay for the Battlestar Galactica soundtracks. They're things of excellence, rating up there with the Planescape: Torment soundtrack, or the scoring for Firefly... apart from one little thing.

One little thing known as a passacaglia³. Or, rather, one helpfully labelled Passacaglia and four variations thereupon, all of which stick in my head like some distilled, purified incarnation of auditory adhesion.

Plus side, at least now I know I have a weapon I can use against those who earworm for evil.

1. Oh, yes. Zombie Apocalypse, A. I get a little optimistic sometimes, but never enough to let myself think - even for a moment - that it might be Zombie Apocalypse, The.
2. See also: Looting.
   
3. Firefox spellcheck, mercifully for it, doesn't know what a passacaglia is. Its nearest suggestions are 'massacring' or 'antimacassar'.
   

Comments

[silmaril.livejournal.com]

Um, yeah. Say hi to metaquotes again in a few minutes' time, after I've had time to post this. I need to select which part to quote first, which will take a while.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

...which explains the mass-friending this morning. Whee!

[arib.livejournal.com]

The Season 3 soundtrack has the BSG version of All Along the Watchtower on it.

Full of yay.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Yes! And it's already called me a Cylon.

[rose.livejournal.com]

I found your journal in metaquotes, and couldn't help but add you because your sense of humor is so awesome. ♥

[palmer-kun.livejournal.com]

You will not regret this. You may regret not setting aside a chunk of time and going over back-entries though :)

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Public relations? Does this mean you need your very own Vera?

[palmer-kun.livejournal.com]

Are you getting me one for Solsticeween?

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

You mean you don't want a stick that sounds like rain?

[palmer-kun.livejournal.com]

No. More like thunder.

A stick that goes "boom" if you will.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

I'm at a loss for boomsticks; would you settle for a chainsaw instead?

[palmer-kun.livejournal.com]

Just like my icon? SPIFFY!

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Then hello! And welcome! And consider some kind of method for keeping the madness out, for well may you need it.

[travellex.livejournal.com]

I am anti antimacassar because my dad is a bit anal about keeping them neat.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

...and now I'm wondering just how far anti-antimacassarism can recurse before it just gets silly.

[palmer-kun.livejournal.com]

I've just realized that your icon could be vastly improved by swapping the bunnies out for nargles... whatever those are

[lilacsigil.livejournal.com]

...my two most useful skills in a zombie apocalypse would be "living in an isolated area" and "pyromania". I'm really good at lighting fires. Oh, also "basic carpentry" and "smashing rickety chairs"! Maybe I will be okay.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Possibly, but you should still find a way to meet up with the rest of the survivors. We'll have shieldwalls and burning pitch and, and flamethrowers.

[tears-of-nienna.livejournal.com]

Because, really, there's nothing worse than knowing you've got the perfect book on how to most efficiently turn zombies into scatterings of body parts, only to not know where it is.

O hai--I has it. (Seriously. I checked out my library's copy of the Zombie Survival Guide this afternoon. Gotta be ready...)

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Hoorays! (Exactly. Read it, study it, and I could appoint you as a Trusted Lieutenant, or as head of the secret police, or something.)

[tears-of-nienna.livejournal.com]

Ooooh, Trusted Lieutenant. Spiffy! *studies*

[maggiebloome.livejournal.com]

Hee. Um. But looking up can actually be just as dangerous as not looking up! (See: 28 Days Later)

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

Obviously eye protection is required, like those splashy plastic face shield thingies. The apocalyptic acquisitions teams will swipe some from hospitals.

[goblinpaladin.livejournal.com]

Clearly I need to fire up the torrents bank card and get me some BSG Soundtracks. You are a bad influence.

[active-apathy.livejournal.com]

I've seen how this works: I'm only a bad influence until you and can listen to it yourself, and then you post something like "ZOMG! I didn't notice how good the music is! Its awesome was just too wrapped up in the general awesome of the show!"

[deepfishy.livejournal.com]

*already has a plan for the construction of anti-zombie "safe space", including places to acquire building materials*

Hmm, useful you are.

[(Anonymous)]

Since, with the new advances in Stem Cell research creating the predecessor to the T-Virus, I think you could be quite useful in the apocalypse ;O)

http://dailyslacker.blogspot.com