Jan. 4th, 2009

Resolution one: Not to make resolutions.
Time until failure: 0 seconds.
Cause of failure: Resolution one.

So, having already lost that particular battle, I decided to try a few more.

Resolution two: Not to lust helplessly after famous people with pretty voices.
Time until failure: 19 hours.
Cause of failure: Liv Kristine. I'm ata loss to understand why Europe didn't just give the Vikings musical instruments - it'd mean things like this came sooner, and that they ended their dance phase earlier.

Resolution three: To update every day.
Time until failure: 48 hours, 1 second.
Cause of failure: 00:00:01, 03/01/2009.

Resolution four: To find a better way.
Time until failure: TBA.
Cause of failure: TBA.

So, New Year's resolutions? Clearly ineffectual, fundamentally flawed, resolve not included, so on, so forth. It's pretty clear how we defeat this menace of irresolution:

Achievements.

Let us consider this further. It's clear from modern games that achievements will make people go to extraordinary lengths to acheive them. Camera Shy. Little Rocket Man. Friendly Fire. Dead Wreckoning. Vanilla Crazy Cake.

Just imagine what this could do for resolutions; instead of "I wanted to quit smoking this year", it'd be "Acheivement unlocked: Lung Function". In place of "I resolve to pay off my debts", there'd be "Achievement unlocked: Solvency". Where once there was "I'm going to learn $THING this year", we could have "Achievement unlocked: S-M-R-T".

Clearly, it's going to need some work. Or some centralised place to keep resolutions to be made into achievements. Or something. But still, this just may be a solution to the general failure of New Year's resolutions.



(Achievement unlocked: Ridiculous Planning.)

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